Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Cuss-O-Meter

I just added a Cuss-O-Meter to the blog. It supposedly analyzes each post in this blog and determines how much of it contains cuss words. I'm rather disappointed. According to the Cuss-O-Meter, only 24.2% of this blog contains cuss words. Only 24.2%! The meter claims 24.% is high, but it ain't high enough for me. Especially since the average cuss level is 369%!

This is 93% LESS than other websites who took this test.


I guess I am gonna have to work on bringing up the score.

Anyway, if you want the Cuss-O-Meter for your own blog/website, grab it here: http://www.oneplusyou.com/q/v/blog_cuss?b

If you do add it to your site, please come back here and let me know what your score is, leave a link back to your site and I will check it out for myself :)

Cheers!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Random Survey

Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet? Yeah, I can name a few... Sean Hannity, Ann Coulter and Rush Limpballs.

How do you flush the toilet in public? Flush? In public? Who does that?

Do you wear your seatbelt in the car? Always.

Do you have a crush on someone? Always.

Name one thing you worry about running out of. Toilet Paper

What famous person do you (or other people) think you resemble? I'm not sure....do you know?

What is your favorite pizza topping? Sausage.

Do you crack your knuckles? Yep...and it drives my mother crazy.

What song do you hate the most? I can't think of any shitty songs at the moment. I'll have to get back to you on this.

Did just mentioning that song make it get stuck in your head? Nope.

What are your super powers? Reading people's minds.

Peppermint or spearmint? Spearmint.

Where are your car keys? On my desk...why? You wanna go for a spin?

Whose answers to this questionnaire do you want to hear? Anyone who is willing to share them with me.

What's your most annoying habit? Procrastinating.

Where did you last go on vacation? To see my family in Rhode Island last May.

What is your best physical feature? I dunno...

What CD is closest to you right now? CD? There are a bunch of DVDs around me right now.

What 3 things can always be found in your refrigerator? Water, light bulb, glass.

What superstition do you believe/practice? None.

What color are your bed sheets? Which ones?

Would you rather be a fish or a bird? a bird so I can fly.

Do you talk on your cell phone when you drive? What cell phone?

What are your favorite sayings? Never say Never.

What song(s) do you sing most often in the shower? Whichever song that happens to be stuck in my head on that particular day.

If you could go back or forward in time,where would you go? I'd go back to the 1950s to see
Frank Sinatra in concert.

What is your favorite Harrison Ford movie? The Fugitive.

What CD is in your stereo? What stereo? People still listen to CDs on a stereo?

What CD will be in your stereo in a few minutes? Your mother's.

How many kids do you plan on having? Who the fuck would want kids? Not me!

If you could kiss anyone who would it be? I wouldn't think of kissing and telling.

What do you do when no one is watching? Everything. I hate doing things when people are watching me.

If they made a movie about your life, what actor/actress would be you? Why the fuck would anyone want to make a movie about my boring life?

Would you rather die in a blaze of glory or peacefully in your sleep? Peacefully in my sleep.

Coffee or Tea? Tea.

Favorite musician(s)/bands you've seen in concert? I haven't seen any of my favorite artists or bands in concert unfortunately.

Have you ever been in love? From afar, yes.

Do you talk to yourself? Yep, who else is gonna put up with my shit?

Strange Survey

Have you ever licked the back of a CD to try to get it to work?: Uhh no, why would anyone do that?

What's the largest age difference between yourself and someone you’ve dated?: A few years.

Ever been in a car wreck?: Yeah, a couple.

Were you popular in high school?: Not really.

Have you ever been on a blind date?: I can't say that I have.

Are looks important?: To some degree, yes, but personality rules.

Do you have any friends that you've known for 10 years or more?: Close friends? Nope.

By what age would you like to be married?: I don't ever plan on getting married.

Does the number of people a person's slept with affect your view of them?: Depends on the person.

Have you ever made a mistake?: Yep, hasn't everyone?

Are you a good tipper?: It depends on the service, if I get good service then someone gets a good tip...if I get bad service then someone gets a bad tip.

What's the most you have spent for a haircut?: $20 which is still too much money for a lousy haircut. $10-12 is reasonable for a male haircut IMO.

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?: No.

Have you ever peed in public?: I suppose so...

What song do you want played at your funeral?: Something by Sinatra.

Would you tell your parents if you were gay?: Nope. My sex life is none of their business.

What would your last meal be before getting executed?: Probably something Italian.

Beatles or Stones?: Neither.

If you had to pick one person on earth to die, who?: Hmmm, I'll have to get back to you on this one.

Beer, wine or hard liquor?: Hard liquor baby!

Do you have any phobias?: Arachnophobia and Ophidiophobia

What are your plans for the future?: To finish this survey.

Do you walk around the house naked?: Not usuallly...do you?

If you were an animal what would you be?: Good question...maybe a bird or a cat.

Would you rather be blind or deaf?: I can't choose. Having either of those disabilities is very frightening.

Do you have any special talents?: I dunno....

What do you do as soon as you walk in the house?: Take off my shoes and wash my hands.

Do you like horror or comedy?: I like 'em both, but I guess I like comedy more.

Are you missing anyone?: I dunno.

If you weren't straight, what person of the same sex would you do?: If I weren't?

Where do you want to live when you are old?: Someplace warm.

Who is the person you can count on the most?: Myself.

If you could date any celebrity past or present, who would it be?: I'll have to get back to ya on this one.

What did you dream last night?: I can't remember.

What is your favorite sport to watch?: I'm not much of a sportsman, but if I had to choose...probably basketball.

Are you named after anyone?: Yep...my father.

What is your favorite alcoholic drink?: Rum & Coke

Non alcoholic drink?: Water

Have you ever been in love?: From afar, yes.

Do you sing in the shower?: Doesn't everyone?

Have you ever been arrested?: Nope.

What is your favorite Holiday?: I don't have one.

Would you ever get plastic surgery?: Not unless I needed it as part of some reconstructive surgery in result of an accident or something.

Have you ever caught a fish?: Yep.