Thursday, February 19, 2009

And they walk among us....

I received this in the email today. Very funny, and very sad...

WHY WE'RE IN TROUBLE

A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of 'why' our country is in trouble !

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so
that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On
an airplane!)

2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to
Cape town. I started to explain the length of the flight and the
passport information, and then she interrupted me with, ''I'm not
trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in
Massachusetts...'' Without trying to make her look stupid, I
calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape-town is in
Africa .'' Her response - click.

3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida
package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando
He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain
that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the
state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and
Florida a very thin state!'' (OMG)

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, ''Is it possible
to see England from Canada ?'' I said, ''No.'' She said, ''But
they look so close on the map.'' (OMG, again!)
Dallas

5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could
rent a car in Dallas . When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed
he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas . When I asked him why he
wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was a big airport,
and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.'' (Aghhhh)

6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know
how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30, and
got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour
ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time
zones... Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, ''Do airlines put your
physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage
belongs to whom?'' I said, 'No, why do you ask?' She replied,
''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my
luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very
rude!'' After putting her on hold for a minute, while I looked
into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the
city code for Fresno , CA is FAT - Fresno Air Terminal, and the
airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to
Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, ''Would it
be cheaper to fly to California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?''

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked,
''How do I know which plane to get on?'' I asked him what exactly
he meant, to which he replied, ''I was told my flight number is
823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.''

10. A lady Senator called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola,
Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer
planes?'' I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter
plane. She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''

11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents
he needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion
about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. His
response, "no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had
to have one of those.'' I double checked and sure enough, his stay
required a visa. When I told him this he said, ''Look, I've been
to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!''

12 A New Mexico Congress woman called to make reservations, ''I want to
go from Chicago to Rhino, NY. '' I was at a loss for words.
Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the name of the
town?'' 'Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the lady. After
some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked
up every airport code in the country and can't find a rhino
anywhere.' ''The lady retorted, ''Oh,don't be silly! Everyone
knows where it is. Check your map!'' So scoured a map of the
state of New York and finally offered, 'You don't mean Buffalo , do you?
The reply. "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it's in!

YES, THEY WALK AMONG US AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED!

Worse, they are in Congress!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is soooo urban myth-y - none of it'strue -
sorry

Stunatra said...

Whether it's true or not, I still find it funny.

phuckpolitics said...

How do you know it isn't true?